I am mad. I’m really mad at god right now seriously. Why do I have to be this way? I’ve always been an anxious person but why have things gotten so bad. This entire weekend I have spent crying and having anxiety attacks for no apparent reason. I feel like a failure and a dissappointment to my parents and my boyfriend. They all tell me I’m not but obviously none of them would have wanted me to turn out this way. I feel awful about myself. I’m not looking forward to counseling. I don’t wanna be on meds that make me not feel anything. I want to be normal happy Danielle. I wanna feel happy again. Why am I this way? Why don’t I have self confidence? Why do I worry about everything, even things that have not even happened? I want to be a guidance counselor in the fall. I want to help people with these problems. But I don’t want to have these problems. Cullen tells me I will be an excellent guidance counselor because of what I have been through. Maybe that’s why god has made me this way. That’s the only reason I can come up with but I’m not really sure. I feel lost. Like I’m in my own little world of worry. Everybody’s been telling me to just think happy thoughts and ill be okay and it will go away, but all the bad thoughts take over and consume my head. All the good ones disappear. I feel like a psycho even though I know I’m not. I think most people look at others who have anxiety and stuff and think “oh they’re not crazy it’s not their fault”, until it happens to you, and you can’t help but feel like a nut job. I don’t wanna be this way. So why am I.
The moment you’ve all been waiting for. The moment I’ve been procrastinating forever. Here you go. The list of what to bring to college. Just a little something before I begin:
One of the most important things to remember is that you don’t need to bring your life to college. You have a limited amount of space that you’re probably sharing with another person. Keep it light, keep it neat. Your life now consists of dorms, classes, dining hall, and parties. You’re going to be seeing the same people every day and doing the same thing every day. Don’t let this list influence you to buy stuff that you’re not going to use, because the main thing here is saving money and downsizing. On the other hand, you’re going to be on your own for the first time and there are probably a lot of things you usually don’t have to think about (laundry supplies, dishes, extension cords, etc).
Anyways, enjoy the list, reblog the shit out of it, and HAVE AN AWESOME TIME SHOPPING.